Psychological Warfare

I've been having some trouble with my kid and REBELLIOUS BEHAVIOR. I've tried everything "traditional" to curb this behavior without much success. Grounding...er... doesn't work and it grounds ME just as much as it does her...So, Keith and I discussed a new way of doing things last night and I think I may try it out and write a book about it so other parents of crazy teenagers can use it to keep their sanity.

Here's how it works. CHANGE EVERYTHING that is normally very "comfortable" for the child into the "uncomfortable." Don't say a word. Just change it little by little and if nothing else, you'll get some satisfaction of playing a little mind game of your own. It's kinda like turning the tables on them - give them a dose of their own medicine so they just won't know what to expect and hopefully if all goes well - she'll be begging for things to go back to 'normal.'

If nothing else, I got so much enjoyment just THINKING about doing some of the things below to freak her little mind out. Here's some of what we thought about doing.....

• She hates spicy food, so I figured each night I would learn to cook something new with varied hot peppers. Now normally, I would make her a special dish without the zip.
  
  
• Get rid of her nice comfy california king bed and replace it with a few sets of bunk beds
  
  
• Why a few sets of bunkbeds? ohhh forgot to mention that i'll be adopting about 6 kids - all who don't speak english and she'll have to share her room. I'm sure she'll enjoy siblings.
  
  
• I think i may 'surprise her' with a couple of pet guinea pigs
  
  
• I may redecorate her room in a My Little Pony theme
  
  
• I'm thinking of throwing a couple of wild card parties at about 2am. hope i don't keep her up
  
  
• Next time parent teacher conferences come around, i'm gonna wear my jammies and some big fluffy slippers
  
  
• I think I may catch some syndrome that makes me slur my words and drool alot around large groups of teenagers.
  
  
• I'm thinking of removing all doors in the house so we can all be closer
  
  
• I think i'll register her name as a domain name and post some of my favorite pics and stories of her so if you google her name - voila.
  

What do you guys think about this new strategy?

Humorfeed Announce Winners for Annual Satire Competition

My dear web forum buddy Watley gave me some cool news today about the fourth annual HumorFeed Award. I thought I'd share the love.

"Baristas Claim Obama's Coffee Not Black Enough!"

That was the story deemed 'best of 2008' in the fourth annual HumorFeed Satire News Awards. The event, which relies on a panel of journalists and comedy writers to rank the best of the best,
is a mainstay for the satire news sites that pepper the web (excepting the Onion, of course).

To cap things off, the winner, writer G. Xavier Robillard - a regular contributor to such
publications as Cracked, McSweeny's, and Comedy Central online - is coming out with a brand-new book in just two weeks.

The book, Captain Freedom: A Superhero's Quest for Truth, Justice, and the Celebrity He So Richly Deserves, is being published by Harper Collins, no less. Robillard is clearly off to a great start in 2009. (Probably the other writers all hate him right now.
First place and a book deal? Seems a bit much!)

But Robillard's winning story is just the tip of the iceberg. Click here for the top ten stories of the year (they include gems such as "Atheist Sees Image of Big Bang in Piece of Toast" and
"Dyslexic Student Expelled Over Toy Gnu"), or if you're really feeling bored at work, try
the whole list of 46 entrants. Some are better than others, of course, but HumorFeed is the gold standard wire service for this kind of thing: you'll be glad you stopped by.

Reconnect

I just received the best gift I could ever receive right in time for Christmas. Years and years ago, there was a wonderful lady who was my neighbor. She had children the same ages as mine and we became the best of friends. We raised our little ones together and shared some wonderful memories together.

Life has a funny way of allowing you to lose touch with people and that is exactly what happened to us. I've searched for her every once in awhile because I've never forgotten what a wonderful friend she was to me....but never found her.

Recently, I started keeping up with my facebook account and thought of her. I couldn't find her on facebook, but I found her little girl who is all grown up now. I've had the best time going through pictures of her beautiful family and reconnecting.

I so regret losing time with her and am so grateful for another chance to make up for time. I challenge all of you to RECONNECT with people who have made a positive impact in your life this Christmas. This reconnection will undoubtedly bring more smiles than a high dollar gift could ever bring.

Christmas DEstressed.

Oddly enough, I've found I have an uncanny calmness preparing for Christmas this year. I've decided to not spend much money and I honestly think that took alot of the maddness away from this typical maddening holiday. I even went to the mall with my kid today just for fun! (i know weird.)

By lowering the spending amount, I spend much more time thinking about what gift would be best for each person and why....making the gift extra special and man it's a lot quicker to get done with a list this way too!

I read about the dude who worked at walmart getting trampled to death from crazed shoppers on "black Friday" and just shook my head in disbelief. It's amazing to me how insane people get each year during this time....you know...the time when we celebrate baby Jesus and peace 'n all that stuff.

I think America has the chance to remember some of the good things in lif now...Yeah the economy taking a nose dive sucks no matter how you look at it, but life is so much more than a paycheck. We need to enjoy it more.

You may be wondering why I have the HOFF pic with this post. No real connection really - it just made me giggle. Merry Christmas to all my many fans ... I'll try to write more next year.

Guilt

I heard the most amazing teaching on GUILT. It so "clicked" with me that I felt the need to share it with all of you. This will surely help anyone who has ever struggled with guilt - and if nothing else it's entertaining. It's audio - so just click and let it play while you are doing whatever you do.

Click to hear

Change has come to America.

Last night, we all got the chance to witness history in the making. I don't care who you supported in this election, or how you feel about Obama's policies - America (as a whole) proved they have PROGRESSED. The American people have changed for the better - in that a black man or a woman is a viable option for the presidency.

I got goosebumps last night while watching this happen - can you even imagine what feelings the elderly black men and women felt who witnessed the segregated US - now watching a black man become elected to the highest office.

Incredible. Exciting.

Slander in the Name of Jesus

I cannot WAIT for this election to be over. Every day, I receive forwarded emails from Christians that contain slander and gossip about Obama. Sometimes, I click on links contained or actually READ and check the "facts" contained in these emails and I'm amazed that this garbage is actually being PASSED AROUND by Christians through the church...and all "in the name of Jesus."

Jesus did not waste even one moment of his time discussing the politics of His day. He fed the poor and invited the "sinners" over for dinner so He could build relationships with them.

I challenge all Christians to at least READ and verify the facts in the political emails you forward to your Christian email ring.

Wii Tennis Champion of the World

Recently, Keith purchased a Nintendo Wii console. The Wii was packaged with a sports game that included the game of tennis. We both found it very fun to play and found it was very accurate with swings etc. Of course, it shortly became a competition to the death. : )

We argued frequently 'who was better,' until Keith had a fabulous idea. He sat down on the couch with a pen and paper and wrote out a contract. Yep - he decided that he would prove he was the master tennis player once and for all. His contract stated that the first person to win 100 games would be proclaimed the Wii Tennis Champion of the World and the loser must call the winner that title at least two times a day for the rest of his/her life. He gloated as he wrote the contract and gave me the pen to sign my signature. I signed my name.

Just last night, the Wii Tennis Champion of the World was proclaimed. My friend, Josh writes it best:

--

Here Ye! Here Ye!

I hereby declare on this day, August the fifth in the year of our Lord 2008 let it be known that on the glorious digital landscapes of the ferocious battlefield of Wii Tennis, Christy has been found privy to a swift and decisive victory over Keith. No mercy to be had, no solace, and no pride left to call his own, Keith has succumbed to the superior wii-waggling abilities of an insidious foe and has found himself weighed, measured, and wanting. Today truly is a day that shall live in infamy. All hail Christy! Let these halls ring out with the tales of her unerring conquest and pray mercy on any soul who dare oppose her!

--

So - all of you who know Keith - please txt, call, email him and ask him ....WHO IS THE WII TENNIS CHAMPION OF THE WORLD! : )

I'm still alive

Ok so - it appears I've taken the summer off from blogging. I bet I've lost all my stalkers now....bummer. I've been working 24/7 on this product we've been working on for the past year. It's almost ready to launch and it's way exciting.

I need bloggers that would be willing to blog about our new product (it's a CMS geared toward churches) when it's ready. I'll fill you in more when I have a site to lead you to.

25 years later

If you knew me as a teenager, you would surely remember my obsession with Van Halen...specifically Eddie. My walls were completely covered with his images and my friends and I would hover around the television waiting for VH videos to come on memorizing every word of their songs so we could sing along with them.

How many times I pretended to be a rockstar myself. ; )

Last night was magical. I can't explain what it was like to see them on the stage again. Where has the time gone?! Short hair and in their 50's - amazing. It brought tears to my eyes to watch it. It was truly an incredible night. Thank you, Keith. xo

Van Halen Babbbyyyyy

Much to my mother's chagrin, I was obsessed with Van Halen in the 80's.....I fantasized about meeting Eddie Van Halen and his photos covered my walls. (who knew how well he would age *scoff*)

Regardless, I never got to see them in concert while they were together and always regretted it. UNTIL NOW. Keith, my amazing manly man, got us tickets to see them on Wednesday. I am so pumped and have been singing 1984 songs all day since I found out.

Yeah! Now....I must rid myself of this horrid cold quickly so my groupie voice can be everything you and I know it can be.

Blog Facelift

Spring time is the best time to get a new look - don't ya think? It's dark and mysterious....muhahahahahaha

Sick of being Sick

I've got some really mean germs havin' a big ol' party inside my body. I've been so sick this week at times I've felt I may die. I really hate being sick when it's so nice outside. You know what I mean - you are lying in your bed with tissues all around your head and the sun peeks in your window to make you feel even worse. You lie there and listen to the sounds of spring and envy the folks out there enjoying it.

Sucks to be sick. Sucks more to be sick in the beautiful spring weather.

Done whining now.

Mommy Nuggets

I often give my kiddos lil' tidbits of knowledge to help them through life that I call MOMMY NUGGETS. They usually just roll their eyes - but i thought I'd post some incase I get hit by a truck they can look back and remember. Feel free to comment and add your own nugget.

• Laugh til you cry and it'll make everything better
• Unconditional love is the most powerful thing on earth
• Never stop learning
• There's nothing you can't do if you want it badly enough
• Racism is merely ignorance and fear
• Differences make the world an interesting place to live
• Don't park next to vans
• Humor keeps you young
• Integrity = Success
• Never walk barefoot in hotel rooms
• Don't get into the habit of writing letters to prisoners
• Don't have sex
• Pedicures are medicine for the soul
• Everything good in life takes hard work or everyone would have it
• The best revenge is a good life lived
• Seek God and you will find Him
• One of the rudest things - LITTERING
• Honor me with a MOM tattoo
• If you put me in a home, I'll for sure get double d's whatever age I am and will send photos of them to all your friends
• A good relationship requires vulnerability
• It WILL make you blind
• Most rapists chose victims based on unlocked doors and garage doors left opened
• Hover.
• Never be totally dependent on another person
• Don't underestimate social perception
• Research. Study. Empower Yourself.